Cento has spend a good part of the day trying to send me stuff over the MSN messenger that only show up on his screen. He's going to Torres Vedras (or Novas, who knows/cares) for the Carnaval so it might be that he's drunk already.
And I hate Carnaval. No is more like HATE CARNAVAL. If there's a perfect time of the year for me to go postal this is it. I swear, if it happens there's a probability of 95% that is in Carnaval. If I see another kid with crappy bigodes painted on his face, dressed up as a Ninja Turtle, Tamagochi, a cooker or some other shitty 3€-special-Continente-pack I'm gonna start ripping heads. I mean, people say that the parents are to blame (que las visten como putas) but honestly how screwed up a kid do you have to be to dress up like portuguese kids do in Carnaval??? Fuck, do you even know what the Ninja Turtles are? Those are like fucking 10 years old why do you dressed like one? You might as well dressed up as Carlos Cruz while you're at it. I went today for launch to MacD (and no, I don't want to talk about it) and the only reason why this little fuck dressed up as a cop (which by the way is the dumbest among the dumbest thing that you could dress up being in Portugal... I mean, if at the age of 6 you take pride in dressing up as a fat beer belly lazy fuck, with a XXL wax covered pinky fingernail and a crappy baby blue shirt open till that cotton hole that call a belly button by the age of 8 you'll be an alcoholic for sure) ended up in the trash can is because I was already having trouble shoving my trade in there as it was.
And don't even get me talking about the Samba schools... Here's what Samba schools in Portugal consist on: 1% of properly fit brasilian girls, 9% of unfit brasilian girls that could never make it into a real brasilian samba school or make out in Carnaval in Rio de Janeiro, the world's biggest orgy where even three-legged dogs get some actio and the only reason they do get in here is because they're actually brasilian and a remaining 90% of sopeiras with big wabling asses that get their kicks reading Maria on public transports. Dear menina sopeira that dances around in a samba school: is not only bad enought that you have an ass that shakes like pig fat strapped to a fan and you have to flash it around but for some sick sadist reason you went on and decided to slap a thong on it.
Thongs are one of man greatest inventions. They're supposed to make a girls behind sexy, cute, adorable and desirable. However not everyone should wear them (me for one). If people puke blood when you strap it on or if your butcheeks reach the back of your kneews you, dear lady, should be wearing something else...
I hate carnaval...
